As this season was filmed before Second Chance, these Survivors had to wait an entire year just for their cast reveal. And then they had to wait until now, the day before the premiere, to see themselves in LEGO, and to find out what my son Kai thinks of them - the struggle is real for these Survivors. Our thoughts pre-game are based purely on the pictures & bios because the videos were fucking impossible to find and I am a busy woman who does NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS, CBS. As always, Kai's thoughts will be in red.
THE BRAIN TRIBE - CHAN LOH
Peter is a hot doctor. Do we have another Babe on our hands? Let's hope so.
"Sounds like everything Barack Obama would say...Illuminati confirmed." - After reading his bio.
I'm a big fan of ice cream, a big fan of Neal, & a big fan of Neal's ice cream. I met Neal in December, and thoroughly enjoyed his company. He's the good kind of strange.
"I dont approve. Stop getting licked by random strangers, Mom."
"Everytime I see him, I'm thinking of him licking your hair. Why, Mom?"
Let it be known that Debbie's bathing suit & my discovery of this minifigure tiger suit is the only reason I put time aside to do this at all this season. So thank (or curse) Debbie. I spent 3 years of my childhood in Reading, PA, so I feel Debbie. Deeply. Living in a town where the main monument is a traditional Japanese-style Pagoda at the top of a mountain, seemingly for no reason at all, is very odd.
"Damn." -Upon reading that Debbie thinks she'll do well because she has torture training.
Aubry is super cute & I love her except for the astrology stuff because no.
Joseph is a former FBI agent who's looking forward to a challenge.
Elisabeth is cute and is a Quantitative Strategist.
THE BEAUTY TRIBE - GONDOL
I learned from Tai's twitter that he has a black cat named Meme that will play fetch. I like that.
"11 siblings? That's, like...irregular."
Nick's Personal Claim to Fame: "I'll always be a better listener than you. Meaning, I listen to people better than you do, I'm more interested in people than you are, and I accept people more than you so. And yes, sometimes I pretend to do these things, but at least I pretend, whereas you just check out and are narcissistic."
"How does he know what we are? He seems a bit cocky."
Anna's a pretty poker player. "Any thoughts on Anna, Kai?"
"........I don't know. No, not really."
Michele is a pretty bartender.
"She seems like she might be able to start some drama. Harry Potter? Maybe she's a nerd, which is good because nerds are awesome."
Julia's cred: "I have done Habitat for Humaity so I know how to build shelter. I have killed cows in Africa, worked on a farm, and know how to make fire. I'm also quick, excellent at puzzles, and have strong social skills from job experience and being a college student." I like her on Twitter.
*raises eyebrows* "Good chance."
I didn't watch Caleb's season of Big Brother so I just know that there's a thing called Beastmode Cowboy although I'm not entirely sure what that means. I can already tell that he's my new Douchey McTool & I'm going to love hating him.
"He really believes in God."
THE BRAWN TRIBE - TO TANG (Not to be confused with Tai Trang of Gondol)
I'm not entirely sure what he goes by, since Jason is all over his Twitter feed while Kyle is nowhere in sight. I need to apologize because it actually takes a lot of time to make these silly LEGO minifigures, especially when not of a young pretty blonde. While I feel good about the board-shorts & the beard, you may notice that I simply used my Brandon Hantz torso, complete with Hantz tattoos circa Caramoan. I realize now that Kyle Jason or Kyle or Jason is a bounty hunter, & a pretty badass guy, & as soon as I have some time I will personalize his tatts so he doesn't have 'Lil Hantz across his collarbone. I'm better than this, especially when the Survivor has a beard. We all know how I feel about those guys. I'm sorry.
"Is he related to Boba? ...hahaha...Nailed it."
I like Darnell's smile. There may have been some miscommunication as he seems to think he's on the wrong tribe, as he says if he could, he would bring "Sunglasses so I can hide from the ugly contestants".
*nodded stoically throughout the bio without offering any thoughts*
Jennifer's my age, and calls herself blunt with no patience for assholes & she likes board games, so we're basically twinsies except for the whole riding motorcycles thing and being a contractor and surviving a lot of serious setbacks in her life, so maybe not so much twinsies - but she's my pick to win.
"She seems like a tomboy"
Yeah, okay, so we're definitely not twinsies.
Alecia is a pretty blonde whose social media accounts hold an inordinate amount of pics of her looking out at some beautiful view. Like, far too many.
|I PUT THIS TOGETHER GOING BACK ONLY 11 WEEKS. NONE OF THESE ARE DUPLICATES.|
"How is she on Brawn?"
I mean, I assume she carries a gigantic suitcase all over the world, so...
I dated a Scot with one "t" about 18 years ago & he was the first guy to break my heart, & I've been able to avoid all other "Scot"s up until this point. My Scot was a baseball player with frosted tips, though, not a former NBA player with kickass hair, so I'll try to keep my personal feelings towards all "Scot"s out of this.
"Literally the best ever."
Kai will have no such problem.
Cydney is a bodybuilder and looks terrifyingly strong.
This is also where I apologize once more for the lack of diversity in LEGO minifigures. If anyone sees a LEGO set with a black female character (or male for that matter, as Darnell is sharing his head with both Jeremy & Brice :/) PLEASE LET ME KNOW. Cydney is sharing a face with not only Tasha, Val, Francesca, and Nadiya, but I have to keep drawing their faces because this head IS ACTUALLY A WEREWOLF. Not cool, LEGO.
"She seems like a good player"
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